Soccer Dad

A long ten minutes

I had just been thinking about my nephew last week. On Feb 28, according to the secular calendar, he turned 20. I remember how I found out about his birth. I was a t a friend's house in New York, and somehow, was able to find out the news from Israel.

Yesterday, I was thinking about him again. This time my feelings were concern, not joy. My wife called to tell me that there had been a terror attack at Merkaz Harav, the yeshiva at which he was learning. There were 8 dead.

I called my mother and told her of the attack and that she might want to call Israel. (At the same time she had received an e-mail from her boss that she do the same. I guess her boss had also heard the news.)

Then I sent out an e-mail to Israeli (and some American) friends, figuring that in the confusion of the situation maybe one of them would find out. As it happens, my mother reached my brother's house and a different nephew told her that his brother was find. He apparently went, Thursday nights to study at a different Yeshiva with a cousin.

One of my nephew's other cousins usually studied in the library on Thursday nights, but because it was Rosh Chodesh (the new Jewish month) he had gone to the Kotel (Western wall) and was out of harm's way.

I finally found out that one of the young men killed was my nephew's roommate.

This isn't my nephew's first connection to a terror attack. In 2002 the family of one of his classmates was ambushed. His friend's father, mother and brother were killed.

And it's not just that nephew. I'm taken aback by the number of terror victims that my brother's family had connections to.

His older brother used to study with the son of Col. Dror Weinberg. Col. Weinberg was considered a rising star of the Israeli army and was religious too. He was killed in an ambush in Chevron.

My sister-in-law, a doctor, has worked with a brother of Dr. Shmuel Gillis, a talented hematologist who was known for his treatment of both Jews and Arabs. (Barbara Sofer wrote "Who will care for Jamila now?" in his memory.)

And my brother was friends with Rabbi Shimon Biran, who had been the Rabbi of Kfar Darom in Gaza. And two and a half years ago, my brother had to watch his friend be buried again.

Of course that's just a small sample of those who have been killed by terror in Israel. Still it gives a sense of the cost of this war against Israel and the degree to which it touches society as a whole.

I'm happy that my nephew's fine, but with the somber realization that there are 8 families who can't say the same thing.

In a few weeks, God willing I'll see him as he is scheduled to come to the States with my sister-in-law for his cousin's wedding. Last year when I visited Israel for a his brother's bar mitzvah, I was impressed by his knowledge of American politics. He started rattling off the margins of victory in each state in 2004. I might be able to say who won a number of states, but not by what margin!

I keep thinking that he'd really appreciate The Almanac of American politics.

When I thought back on those minutes of uncertainty, I mentioned it to my wife. She said, she remembered how it felt. I felt stupid. Of course she did. Her brother was in the North Tower. We only had one communication from him over 2 and a half hours before we knew he was safe. We knew he had left he building. (I was stupidly optimistic that day. At first, I figured he was safe because the plane hit 50 floors above where he worked. Then when we heard that he was out of the building I figured he was safe because I never figured that the buildings would collapse.)

Ten minutes of uncertainty is a long time.

UPDATE: Please read In Context's thoughts. They are extremely poignant.